Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize