i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize