yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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