so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
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I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
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We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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