is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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