The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
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