woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
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