porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Randomize