Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize