considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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