no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
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