did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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