My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
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