if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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