So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize