She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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