Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize