Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
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