I hate your face
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
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