things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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