i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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