This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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