I hope mine doesn't look like that
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
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I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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