**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
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