My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
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she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
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I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
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