Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize