I got chris browned last night
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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