What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
how do flat chested girls get laid?
She just used a chaser for red wine.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
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I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
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It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
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