Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize