I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
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