Barsexuality is the new black.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
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