He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
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