I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
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