So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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