i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize