the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
we're so committed to being not committed
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
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