Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize