Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
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