I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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