i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
third nipple confirmed
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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