I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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