Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
When did angry sex become our thing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I need a beard to bite.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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