pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize