I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Hippo gnu deer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
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