I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize