haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
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