How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
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