I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
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Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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