I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
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