I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Randomize